Monday, September 14, 2009
Today, was suppose to be a day, where people would give a tumultuous welcome for happiness. A day, where i would find it delectable to endeavour....
Yet, anguish enter into my day,i thought i could bask in the happiness that today had to offer, but something that is an off-beat came in and spoiled the happiness.
I know i should not have been so dissolute, inhumane, godless, malicious and incorrigible. i know i should not be a cynic and should try to be more optimistic. i know i do not merit your love for me...
Now, it seems like i am oblivious to everything in life,now i know what kind of superlative havoc, chaos or pandemonium, life can offer.... sometimes, i quest for the love from you, but i know that is just a wishful thinking....
This time i have the resolve to keep my love for you, for i will not change the person that i like...
but sometimes it is quite hard to stifle an arduous, love for you.... now i feel indignant and aloof.
I should not have tamper into your traumatic, or appalling situation... i am sorry, but i really want you to be adjacent by me and to share your burden with me... i hope i can valiantly show you how much i love you, but everytime when i am about to, i deliberate on it and think meticulously, yet wary of what i can say....
Now i know, how much avarice could cause a person's destiny. i really try to contrive a plan to ignite the intellingence in me.... But all of that was just a pertext for myself, to dispel all the doubts i have for my love for you....
you are ardent and immaculate, but i am an exceeding cynic, i really vied to keep myself from being anonymous and ostracize by society...
I know, it is a derisive comment, i should not have said all those ominous comments..... My energies are depleting.... i am really very exhausted now.... i do not want to manifest my anguish, but i really cannot take this bleak data anymore....
i keep on espionaging you, i just cannot keep my feelings to myself.... i am encircled by the sorrows that you have given me.... i know i am eccentric, but please do not feel disdain, as i did not wish for this to happen too.....
Guess next time, i should try to be more congenial... i am sorry, but i really feel aloof and indignant.... i am really burned out....
` the last name was written at
5:22 AM
